Mr Scarcity

My name is Mr scarcity

I’ll be your friend

Just wait and see.

I’m in that article you read

the one that filled your heart with dread,

I’m in the TV,

In that book

I’m everywhere that you could look

I’m in your pocket,

on your phone

And when you’re quiet and alone

and your head fills up with doubt

I’ll be right there to sniff it out!

I have the antidote you see

for I am Mr scarcity!

Buy Me!

Try Me!

Don’t deny ME!

I’ll make your life complete believe me!

Not big enough?

Not tall enough?

Not strong enough?

Not small enough?

In this world we live today

there’s no need to hide away

Don’t you tremble, never fear

Mr Scarcity is here!

That chest. So flat.

No curves at all.

You think the boys are going to call?

You need to push them up my love.

Go on, give them a great big shove.

Not big enough?

Oh, no I say

we need to find another way

A little nip, a tiny tuck

we’ll pump them up! Now that’s enough!

But wait, by golly what are they?

Too sexy, slutty, put them away!

Not sweet enough, too big By FAR!

You need this minimiser bra!

You peep over your neighbours fence,

Now what is that?! That is immense!

You’re BBQ’s not big enough,

and where are we going to put all the stuff

you need to keep up with MR Jones

with his flashy watch

and brand new phones

with his garden furniture so neat

How on Earth can you compete?

Never worry, never fear!

Mr Scarcity is here!

Buy me!

Try me!

Don’t deny me!

Lets make Mr Jones green with ENVY!

Now you have this fancy stuff

your house is SO not big enough.

Just one bathroom?

You need MORE!

One on every single floor!

And that bedroom’s far too small

What if Mr Jones was to call?

I know he’s never been before

But can you really be so sure?

Buy Me!

Try ME!

Don’t deny me.

Now why do you still feel so empty?

I know what you need to do

to make you happy through and through!

You need MORE money!

That’s the key!

So you can buy more stuff from ME!

Stuff will fill that nasty hole

and make you feel more in control.

Until that stuff gets old of course.

But never fear!

Have no remorse!

I have got the remedy!

I am Mr Scarcity!

Buy Me!

Try ME!

DONT deny me!

You’re not enough

trust me completely!

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